Stories are a part of our daily lives as human beings. If we think a day has ever passed without us hearing, reading, or telling a story, it is because we do not realize it or do not understand what a story is. It is impossible to spend a day with another person and a story does not come up. Stories connect us and shape our view of the world. From childhood to adulthood, most of the information about what happened in the past, what is happening in the present, and what will possibly happen in the future has been and continues to be passed to us in form of stories. From our social activities to our news, documentaries, movies, and advertisements, stories dominate almost all forms of communication.
It is easy to look at someone else‘s life and have assumptions and stories to tell about them. But, behind what we normally see and hear about every individual are untold stories drawn from experiences that have brought the person to their present life. Regardless of how much we spend time looking into other people’s stories, we cannot run away from the fact that we have ours too. Everyone has a story to tell about their own experiences or what others have shared with us. Sometimes we find ourselves talking more about other people’s stories because we cannot stand the details of our own stories or, maybe we just admire the next person so much that we think their story is worth sharing.
Everyone has a story to tell, so what?
Recognizing that we all have our stories, both positive and negative is something we still need to normalize as people. It is something that can help improve our relationships with one another and know the right way to treat each other. Most of the problems we have as peers and families stem from the failure to understand that each person has their own journey and own story which does not have to be similar to anyone else's. This often causes us to look at other people's stories as though they are bizarre and there is something wrong with the person – acceptance issues!
Maybe we need to learn to ask ourselves the following questions when we find ourselves spending too much of our energy in telling other people’s perceived stories. Do I understand enough to dwell on their story? How differently would they tell my story if they tried to do the same? How is dwelling on the person’s story helping me improve or change mine? Imagine what the world would be like if we learned to focus on our own stories, told them (stories) more that we tell other people's stories, gave others a chance to tell, and helped them improve or change their story.
Through sharing our stories, we get to understand each other better. However, this requires us to change our mindset first and learn to do it for the right reasons. Sometimes we are self-absorbed and tend to make everything all about us. This is true especially in relation to people who always want to be in the spotlight. Have you ever approached someone when you were in desperate need to be heard and just after introducing your story, the person takes over and starts telling their story instead? The person is always burning to tell his or her story and believes that they have something precious to share with others or that they need more sympathy than the other person. But, if they took the time to listen they will realize that they have so much to learn from others and that it helps them plan their responses based on the other person’s needs. Who knows, by learning to give others a chance and also be given a chance to share stories, we might discover that we are each other's solutions or can make a good team based on our shared dreams!
We have platforms where we share some aspects of our life journey and stories. However, most of our posts often omit a part of our reality for fear of being judged and also wanting to fit in. We want to live perfect lives and it is the side we want to portray to everyone. But, if we looked deep into everyone’s story we will find that even the people who are admired by the world do not have perfect lives. Some people have stories that can change our lives but they cannot share them because from where they stand, our fake stories make theirs seem not good enough. They do not want to be judged and undermined.
How about you make it part of your story enjoying every moment of your life and using your story to inspire others as you head towards your desired future. How much of our social lives would be changed for the better if we learned to tell our stories the way they are? Appreciating that life may never be completely perfect can help us create meaningful relationships, be there for one another through it all and learn to take things easy. All we need to do is understand that everyone has a story to tell, and everyone’s story can change.
What are your thoughts? Leave a comment below.
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